#15 Seven Samurai

This is probably the first one on the list that the general public won’t have seen or even heard of. So, I’ll recap: It’s a Japanese movie from 1954 about a small village that hires seven samurai to defend them from a band of forty bandits. Sounds simple and concise, right? No. It’s almost three and a half hours long. The story covers a lot of ground in that amount of time. And the director, the very-famous-in-Japan Akira Kurosawa knows exactly what to do with it. In the Asian tradition, we start at the very beginning, from the bandits deciding to raid the village when the barley ripens, whenever that is. This gives the villagers a time frame to plan how to defend themselves. We follow the town meetings, their decision and then follow those chosen on their journey to find and hire samurai, despite having no money with which to pay. Six are selected, with another one tagging along.

From here, Kurosawa begins to open up the story. Shortly after the samurai return to the village and begin preparations for its defense, we the audience discover that the villagers themselves are hardly innocent victims. Being dirt poor and unsupported in a world with almost no oversight, the village has long been susceptible to outside interference. In the past, they had either lured in, or been tormented by, wandering samurai and killed them, keeping their armor and weapons. I couldn’t really tell which, but the message was that the villagers are bandits of sorts in their own right. Another sub plot is that samurai, who are warrior class by virtue of birth and not virtue, are not always as noble as legends say. Many were greedy, mean or stupid. In fact, the tag along mentioned earlier, was not a samurai at all, but the son of a slain farmer who decided to teach himself how to fight and to carry a massive sword. He turns out to be one of the most intelligent of the seven, despite his lowly birth, and being crazy. Kurosawa handles these subplots amazingly well and weaves them and the main story together seamlessly in an astoundingly realistic world.

This is a great movie to watch and learn a little history while you’re at it. The only thing is that it’s in Japanese and you’ll have to read, which most Americans hate. But they wouldn’t get it anyway, so who cares? Smart people will like this movie, so watch it if you have half a day to kill.

#14 Goodfellas

This review took me so long because I don’t really like this movie. I’ve seen it before a couple times and I was never really impressed. It’s a well made, well acted, well scored gangster movie that helped define what made a gangster movie, but I guess it just wasn’t for me. I can’t really give a good reason why. Maybe it’s how heavy it is. I mean there is some seriously depressing shit in this movie. Such horribleness. Everyone is mean to each other, people are killed for nothing, and everyone snorts cocaine. Ray Liotta and Lorraine Bracco fight constantly. How messed up are their kids going to be?

But aside from that, I can’t really think of anything. Maybe I just don’t really vibe on gangster movies. As I try to think about it, I don’t think I can name one I like all that much. Except the Godfather series, but that’s the Cadillac. Everyone likes the Cadillac.
Anyway, I put this one off for too long. But that shouldn’t happen again as I the next one has been eluding me for almost 2 years.
Also, I don’t like Ray Liotta.

#247 Casino Royale (2006)

A James Bond movie - I really enjoy the James Bond movie series. Sure the plots tend to be from the same mold each time, but I watch movies to be entertained and this delivers entertainment.

I believe this one focuses so heavily on the high stakes poker game to draw on the peak of poker's public popularity. The poker game is No Limit Texas Hold 'Em - the same poker variety that was sweeping through poker tournaments and casinos and getting shown on ESPN in 2006. I'm sure that facet's inclusion was not a coincidence.

The plot involves your typical Bond-going-rogue in his quest to complete his mission his own way. There are double crosses with twists and more double crossings. Bond gets his girl as usual. If you like James Bond movies then you'll like this one. If you don't you won't. It's that simple.

Some things that caught my eye this time through (I have seen it before as well):

1. MI6 knows the bad guys locations, their crimes, and cohorts. Bond looks through the main enemy's dossier midway through - complete with known associates and a rap sheet. Why go through the risk, hassle, and un-needed event that was the high stakes poker tournament? Just arrest the criminals and be done with it. (Of course, then there would be no movie - but a movie with things like this in it...? Find a way to make it a necessary plot element?)

2. It seems Bond recovered from his ball smashing torture rather quickly and ably - boning up the Bond girl not much after (the time-line is somewhat vague there, but the description given of the torture didn't leave much room for 'parts being usable afterward'...)

3. At the 2hr 3m 18s point in the movie, the Bond girl (yes she had a name in the movie, but I prefer to use this reference) was on a boat with Bond when the scene focuses on her facial expression. In the background is a storefront type building with "I R" on it in big letters. As I watched this scene I noticed something I had never caught before - the letters seem to float in mid air. That is, as the buildings flow by in the background (they are traveling down the river) the letters do not move in a manner consistent with the building movement. Go ahead and check it out, let me know what you think.

#13 Casablanca

I just watched Casablanca for the first time. Kind of a strange thing for a self proclaimed movie buff to say. I realize my introduction to Bogey is overdue; it’s just that I was raised in a different time. My movie classics came from John Landis or were related to the world not being real. I have to say though; the best are the best for a reason. This movie is spectacular. It is truly moving. I won’t try to compete with the near infinite reviews and interpretations that already exist for this movie in the world. But I will relate how it touched me. I’m at a point in my life where I needed to see a man like Ricky. I think most 21^st century American men do as well. This guy is the coolest guy since Sean Connery. I think I’ve found a new personal hero. Rude, indifferent, emotionally unreachable, smokes like a chimney, drinks like a sailor, and is a true sentimentalist underneath it all. We are pansies. I have a lot of respect for a man who gets his heart broken, drowns his sorrows, and picks himself up all collected and calm again the very next day. No wallowing or weak pining and lamenting. Just a bottle of bourbon and a single night to shed it all away. I just haven’t met anyone in this day and age who is like that. Tough like that. And then to give up his chance at the end in order to do what is truly right, we definitely don’t think like that anymore. And he does it remorselessly. That’s conviction that I admire. Even kills a guy. Although that jerk had it coming.
One thing that was really cool was to see all the great lines that I had heard my entire life delivered in context. This movie has 5 or 6 of the greatest lines in movie history. The way with words that the characters have is very proper and old timey, but in an amazing way, rather than boring. Just more to the point than I’m accustomed to. I really felt connected to the characters because the dialogue they used was so descriptive. They really knew how to express themselves with words. I ramble, but this is truly a great movie that had me yelling at the TV and feeling right along with them. I think I will now go find more Bogart movies.

#12 Star Wars: A New Hope

As I mentioned in a previous review, George Lucas has lost his shit. He lost it sometime between the 70’s and releasing the original three again. And I was a little disappointed to find out I had acquired the Remastered edition of the original Star Wars. Sure the space flight stuff and all the pretty colors looked cool, but the additional effects and added scenes sucked. The meeting with Jabba was actually alright; with the exception that it contains the only reference to Human Beings in all three originals. But some of the background stuff was idiotic. Like right after Luke finds his family murdered and decides to leave with Obi Wan, we see a big robot smack an annoying smaller robot. Nothing says, “I’m over my dead family” like classic robot slapstick. Although, I have to mention the greatest goof in history (according to me at the time, and I watched it 70’s style) was in the original cut, and I never noticed it. A storm trooper that is slightly taller than the others, walked into a low door. Bonked his head and almost fell over backward. I almost plotszed. Another hilarity was Harrison Ford in the detention center on the phone with the imperial guy. He had that ridiculous voice and rambled on about how fine they all were before inquiring the same of the operator. Then shoots the thing and clearly refers to the fact that on set, there was only him talking to a table, and says, “It was a one-way conversation anyway.” That’s some great improv Indy.

More officially, I can’t say anything about this movie that I didn’t say about Return of the Jedi. Same faults, same magic, just a slightly better piece of the story and maybe more credit for being the first one. I’m still surprised that this one is the #2 Star Wars.

Last thing that always bugged me. Why are there only 6 Tie fighters protecting something as freaking huge as the Death Star? I think there should have been like 6,000. Just a more logical number.

#11 Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

Goddamn this is a long movie. Took me just under a month to get through it. It's a little peculiar that just one of the trilogy makes its way so high up on the list, as they are basically all one movie. Which is the only way to make these books into movies that are any good. That being said, this is clearly the most interesting piece. Great action, profound moments of introspection and the final resolution to a truly epic adventure. This story is awesome and it took some major talent and even bigger balls to turn it into such a great movie trilogy. I’ve read all the books and I cannot have imagined it better than the finished product Peter Jackson gave the world.
The last scene is truly touching for me. It grips me with feelings of loss and of being lost. What do you do when you say goodbye to a friend closer than a brother forever? How do you live your life after living through such a harrowing adventure? Where do you go when you have seen the what the world has to offer? These questions are so moving to most people that they can’t be answered fully. Ever. I am for some strange reason quite susceptible to these sentiments as I am feeling quite adrift at the moment. On some level, I feel like it was me saying goodbye to my best friend as I realize that this amazing story that has captivated me for the last 2 years is now over. Call me a nerd, but I get that way after the final episode of every beloved TV show. I can’t even speak for the first 20 minutes after the last episode of Cowboy Bebop and I’ve seen the whole series 4 times.

Anyway, I don’t think there is anything particularly different about this movie compared to the other 2, so I am just going to say one thing: I think Tolkien was a master.

#248 Mou gaan dou [EN: Infernal Affairs] (2002)

Excuse the poor etiquette by starting this off talking about a different movie and including so much off-topic discussion, but...

The Departed, which I am sure most people have seen, is simply an American re-make of this movie - Infernal Affairs. Before viewing Infernal Affairs, I had no idea it was the original foreign version of The Departed. It took about 15 minutes and I just had this feeling I had seen this movie before without English dubbed-over voices and Chinese actors. It hit me when the police Chief (or some high ranking police officer who knew too much) was thrown off the top of the station after being jumped in the elevator by the bad guys. BAM! This thing is a rip-off of The Departed!... wait, no way - it came out BEFORE The Departed, which is a rip-off of Mou gaan dou!!! :-o

So many similarities by the end of the movie, and even more as I think back through both movies. I won't list them here, watch both movies (if you have seen neither, view Infernal Affairs first) and you'll agree.

I liked Infernal Affairs, and if I had never seen The Departed I would be even more enamored with this film. A solid police drama with plot twists galore - you may not see them coming if you haven't seen the "re-make".

In case you couldn't tell by reading what I typed above, I now hate The Departed even more (I never really liked it in the first place). Maybe it wasn't intended to be taken as original (The Departed, that is), but I never saw or heard anything telling me "based on Mou gaan dou (Infernal Affairs)" >.<

Scorsese should be ashamed for trying to pass off The Departed as anything original. He just used American actors and made very slight adjustments (if you can call it that) to the scenes to make money off movie-viewers thinking he had directed an original film.

That is all.

#10 Star Wars: Episode V – The Empire Strikes Back:

I don’t know what surprised me more: that there is a Star Wars in the top ten or that it’s not the first one. As a kid, I generally regarded The Empire Strikes Back as the least of the three original Star Wars movies. Now that I’m an adult, I can clearly see that Ewoks suck ass. But come on! I know it’s a classic and all and spawned an ertire race of geeks, but why? These movies really aren’t that good. None of them. George Lucas was insane. He was not a great filmmaker. The movie is full of plot holes and bad dialogue. I mean, are we to believe that Hoth, the asteroid belt and Lando’s place are all 5 minutes away from eachother? The Falcon never jumps to hyperspeed to go to any of these places! And it is just silly to think that you can travel between systems without hyperspeed!!!

I guess it speaks to the imagination more than to the pragmatic side. I really do love Star Wars. I’ve seen the originals countless times and even the godawful first two new ones have enjoyed many turns through my DVD player. It’s just funny to take a step back and look at them as just films and not legends. I really do hate Geoge Lucas though. Mark Hamil is crap too, the Wookie emotes better, unless you count being a whinny little shit, that he’s got a handle on. But he made a kickass voice for the Joker.

#249 The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951)

I'm back... reviewing another movie from well before my time.

I do not have a personality geared toward giving a movie such as this a proper review, as I take interest in politics/the history of politics to a degree best described as mostly disinterested.

The Day the Earth Stood Still is certainly a political statement movie, no doubt about that. A spacecraft from another planet lands in the middle of Washington DC, announcing non-hostile intentions but the 'alien' occupant (named Klaatu) is shot by a soldier by mistake. Klaatu's indestructible robot protector then shows some of its limitless power by melting guns and tanks with a stare. Klaatu wishes only to address a group of representatives from each nation of the world to give Earth an ultimatum.

Throughout the movie, nuclear weapons are the focus of the non-Earthly visitor - the other sentient planets of the universe have become aware of Earth's development of nuclear weapons and warn that any attempt to use these in a manner affecting other planets will result in Earth's elimination by the galactic police (robots like Klaatu's protector, Gort). A stiff penalty for something that I'm not really sure has ever been a realistic possibility... or has it?

The fact that this movie chooses to completely skip over the idea of Earth's residents disastrously using nuclear weapons to do what we do best - kill ourselves - and jumped right to Earth using these weapons in space is very puzzling. And against species we did not know existed until they landed on Earth and told us not to shoot nukes into space... Or else they would destroy our planet. :-/

Overall, this was a decent movie but don't expect any slick special effects, mind-blowing plot twists, or intense action scenes. The acting in places is somewhat shallow - modern child actors can act circles around the kid actor in this movie. If you get a chance, it is worth a watch but I definitely question its place on the IMDb Top 250 list.

#9 The Dark Knight:

Holy shit this is a good movie. My favorite so far on the list. Of course I’d seen it before. I have liked it since the very first time. But movies are a little different when you watch them alone late at night. You are drawn into them more and I think the experience is much deeper. This particular viewing moved me more than the previous ones. The acting, the suspense, the themes and messages were so vivid and clear to me. More on that in a minute. First, Maggie is a thousand times better than Katie. I personally have the hots for Kates, but as we’ve all seen since she signed the contracts with Tom, she can’t act. Maggie is cute as hell and really brought her character to life. Actually, that’s pretty close to the only criticism I have, that every actor brought their characters to life. Too well. I mean, you can’t blame them, most of the supporting cast have (or received) Oscars. But they were all so good and deep that Batman himself was overshadowed. Christian Bale is good, but not Oscar good. So at times, I really found myself thinking of Batman as a lesser character. More of a supporting part. Alfred is cheeky and wise, Lucius is super cool, and the Joker is threatening again. I know, I know, talking about the Joker is cliché. So much has already been said about Heath’s last complete role. But not enough has been said. There’s real viciousness in him. Things that I’ve only seen on real life videos of people being barbaric. Not things that are typically on TV or in movies. He tapped into the dark side. The Joker in movies and TV before this was kinda just comic relief. He wasn’t scary. He wasn’t really dangerous. This one is.
Towards the end, the theme became apparent in the form of Batman’s decision to do what is right, not what is honest, in taking the blame for Harvey’s rampage and going rogue. That the truly strong leaders do what is, in the end, right. Which isn’t always what society preaches. This is because not everyone is a true leader. You have to be right to lead. There are books and classes and techniques to leading people around, but that’s not the real deal. The real leaders know what is right and do it, ignoring the rules. It’s OK to lie to an entire city, if you really do know what’s best for it. The people would disagree. Say that their right to know has been violated. But that’s what makes them the people, and not the leaders. This part of the movie is what really puts it at the top for me. I’ve felt that way my whole life. It’s just nice to see someone else sees the world that way so I don’t look like such an asshole.

#8 One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest:

Coming in, I knew very little about this movie. Pretty much just what was included in that one episode of Futurama. In the end, it really came out as a different sort of movie than I had expected it to be. I figured that Nicholson was destined to become one of the insane as a message that anyone can become crazy if left in an institution like that. Turns out, he learns how to be a better person and therefore is less insane by the end. Well, the end of him as a person. A lobotomy will pretty much leave you a turnip.

As far as my enjoyment of the movie itself? I’d have to say I was a little bored throughout. It really didn’t grab me and pull me in as the others on this list have. Now, far me it from me to say anything negative about a movie that won the big 5 from the Academy, that’s a staggering feat worthy of respect. So, I’ll just say that I didn’t get it and assume it’s my bad. It’s probably really good if you’d read the book. What I read off wikipedia about the book catches my interest more. Seems like its critiquing society and the way we are all controlled by social norms, which is a topic I like.

Last thing is that I hate Nurse Ratched. Not because she’s this movie’s villain. No, I hate her because I am a Star Trek fan. If you are too, you know what I mean. I hated Kai Winn from the moment she showed up at DS9. Acting all high and mighty and shit while screwing things up for everyone. Always making Kira feel like crap. Ratched is pretty much the same character too. Maybe Oscar worthy, but I’d still like to strangle her.

#7 12 Angry Men:

This movie is without a doubt, the most interesting boring movie I have ever seen. The whole thing takes place basically in one room. Only 8 minutes of the film transpire outside of the Jury Room, and most of these are in the bathroom. Not a single thing bursts into flames or is shot repeatedly by Bruce Willis. On paper, it’s hard to grasp why this movie was able to keep my attention and even go so far as to intrigue me. It was certainly made in a different time, when dialogue, camera angles and lighting were used to set the tone and relay the plot. Interesting fact, no screen time is devoted to back stories other than setting up the court case. The only details we get about the jurors is their jobs, which in 1954 might as well have served as personalities, and whatever else we glean from appearance and behavior during deliberations. The time this movie was made was a time for people that are so different from my generation, I’m not even sure I have the right to review this movie. Point of fact, that’s sort of something that I gleaned from the film itself. The themes of doubt and respect are so prevalent I get a little wobbly of conviction when analyzing it with my skewed, 21^st century perception. I mean, where do I get off? Ignoring that for the sake of a compliment, this movie is damn good. In fact, it rocks. Michael Bay has never seen anything like it. Someone should make sure he’s aware of non-exploding plot lines. I love the fact that it begins with one man of conviction standing up for the simple thing of deliberate consideration. All he wanted was a thought-out decision, nothing more. I’m not even sure where he decided that the kid wasn’t guilty. One by one, the other jurors are shown that acting hastily almost resulted in a grave injustice. By far my favorite part though, was when Henry Fonda baited Juror #3 into screaming “I’ll kill you”, just as was testified too during the trial.

So, this is a keeper. You should watch it at home and decide for yourself whether you agree with the one man, or the original 11 that stood against him. Even now, at the end, I’m not convinced that the kid was not guilty. One other thing, I’m glad this was a short one. Most of these are almost 3 hours long if not over and I’m glad to have an in-and-out movie once in a while.

Off Topic Rant #1

Alright, that’s it! I’m pissed. I was hoping not to have to bring this up, but it just won’t go away. The more time passes, the more I hear about how great The Hurt Locker is. It isn’t. It really isn’t. It’s a crappy movie. I am tired of hearing about how great this thing is. It’s the emperor’s new clothes all over again. The acting is good, but that’s about it. The characters are shallow and frankly stupid. Who cares about a bunch of dogs who don’t know their place in the world?

Now, I’ve recently become quite critic of the modern US military, so I can see that I’m probably jaded. It’s not the soldier’s fault. It’s the military’s. The people who volunteer are by and large, the dregs of modern society. Addicts, drop outs and generally about as intelligent as a 14 year old. And there’s no shame inherent in that. But then the army comes along and tells them all sorts of bullshit about being the top 1% and type A and gives these people a sense of false superiority. And that’s great, on the battlefield. But when they come home, get drunk, and are challenged, they can’t handle it and get all shooty and stabby. Acting basically like their favorite dog, the pit bull.

But, I digress. The movie actually does a decent job of portraying this lost soul thing. Maybe it’s just that I am not sympathetic? But on another note, this movie still sucks. The military aspects are all so stupid. I lost count of the times that one of these soldiers did something that should have killed them. A good soldier wouldn’t waste their life like that. Or at least shouldn’t. I actually have a friend who fought in Iraq and got shot through the knee. So he knows a little more about what’s going on at the front than I do, and he saw this movie. He told me that for the most part, the soldiers are that dumb and prone to dying stupidly. So I guess I’m just mad at the situation. But despite all the holes I am putting in my own theory, I still don’t think this movie is anywhere near worthy of so many accolades. And in no way should we celebrate stupidity like this, even if it’s in the form of bravery.

#6 Schindler’s List:

I know more about World War II than you do. I say this with complete confidence, barring the occasional scholar. But I only make this note to make clear that nothing presented in this movie is new to me. I am able to write casually about such a terrible occurrence simply through studying it for 15 years. That out of the way, this is a great re-telling of the horror through the lens of a simple German business man. Early in the film, there’s a character-defining moment between Oskar Schindler and his wife where he reveals his greatest desire is to be remembered. Suffices to say, he succeeded. This movie is about a man who saw the opportunity of a lifetime in the Nazi desocialization of Jews in Poland and turned it into one of the most heroic and uplifting stories of the Holocaust. He started out nearly penniless, made the right connections, made the right deals and made a fortune selling pots and pans to the German army using Jewish forced labor. As time went on, the Nazi treatment of the Jews began to take a toll on Schindler and he changed his agenda. He spent all of the fortune he had made saving his workers from extermination. In the end, he was broke again. It’s a special sort of person who can do all that in the span of 6 years. And it’s a special actor to convincingly play a man of such depth. Liam Neeson does just that. He transforms as the movie progresses. At the beginning, the atrocities are just background to the opportunity at hand. Schindler only sees dollar signs. The movie itself doesn’t linger too long on the deaths of the innocent. But the tone and the character and the man all changed when the relatively comfortable ghetto changes into the cold and stark work camp. The German brutality is increased several fold during the “liquidation” and the internment. In this, I find my only criticism: Goth’s sociopathic tendencies were a little much for me to believe. There’s no human in the character Ray Fiennes portrays. Just a brutal, murdering animal. I felt that was too easy a juxtaposition to make. That being said, I am fully aware that most of the depictions of brutality are historical. But by the end, even I was desensitized to the violence. Humans are adaptive by nature. And the survivors of the camps know this better than anyone else possibly could. The actors did well to show this facet of humanity and so to did the direction.

Now one thing I have to give credit to; it is tough to insert laughs into this movie without blaspheming, but Speilberg managed to do it at least three times. Once is quite literally the definition of “gallows humor.” Hats off to you sir. As so many people of my generation are only vaguely aware of the specifics of the Holocaust, I recommend that anyone under the age of 30 watch this movie.

#241 Anatomy of a Murder (1959)

Anatomy of a Murder (AM) features 'old-time' acting names I recognize immediately - George C. Scott, as slick big-city lawyer Claude Dancer, and James (Jimmy) Stewart, as down-home friendly country lawyer Paul Biegler.

This is my 2nd straight review of a film from pre-1960. Once again, I am left entertained and thoroughly impressed. AM did not need special effects or tasteless crude humor (there is some "crude" humor at times in AM, but nothing compared to modern films) - many of the eye-catching things modern movies so heavily rely on to cover up sub-par acting, poor writing, or sloppy plotlines - in order to hold my attention for 2 hours and 40 minutes. I never found myself bored or looking at my watch. Now, on to the review.

You've seen similar plots before - a slick lawyer painted as the bad guy with the equally-slick-but-in-a-nice-way good-guy lawyer duking it out back-and-forth in a court room regarding a case with twists and turns leaving the verdict up in the air until the end. See: Runaway Jury and to a lesser extent Erin Brockovich. I submit that AM is likely the first to do so, definitely at such a high level.

What defense can be offered to murder? Certainly self-defense is a righteous reason. It might also be an accident, or lacking just cause and straight up criminal murder another. There is only one other - plead insanity. The temporary insanity murder defense gets cast in a light that leaves doubt both ways.

I could not help but notice the similarity between the defendant (an army Lieutenant) and what is a commonly held stereotype of soldiers in today's world: rule-bending, jealous, angry at the drop of a hat, overly-protective of their lady in harmless situations, and somewhat hypocritical when it comes to actions and when certain actions are right and just.

Finally, I have to admit (perhaps showing my lack of 'older' movie knowledge and experience? perhaps not) that the issues confronted and dialogue in AM at times caught me off-guard. The words 'slut' and 'bitch' are used (albeit only once each to my count) similar to the way modern movies do, but here it was natural conversation. I am also quit sure that I will never hear the words 'panties' or 'sperm' spoken more in one sitting than during AM. The topics of murder, insanity pleas, and rape are necessarily involved in most every bit of the plot. However, none of these words or topics are used flippantly or out of context of reality.

I highly recommend watching Anatomy of a Murder the next time you find yourself in the mood for a quality movie in black-and-white.

#5 Pulp Fiction:

I’d like to dedicate this entry to Captain Phil Harris who dies today of causes linked to the life he didn’t know how to live without. I wish you good fishing. On to the movie. I’d seen Pulp Fiction probably around 30 times by this viewing. It’s probably Tarantino’s best movie he’ll ever make. Perfectly laid out and awesomely intertwined. If you’ve ever seen his latest and worst movie to date, Inglorious Basterds, then you’ll know the man has a flair for dialogue. Only in Fiction, it stays interesting to hear the banter or threats from the main characters. I’ve always loved the opening monologue between Vincent and Jules, and the fact that it’s only a few cuts makes it all the more entertaining. Although it’s still hard to believe that it’s this high on the list. There aren’t any other good movies in the top 20 of the “Fuck” list. I know Goodfellas is, but I don’t like Goodfellas. But anyway, this movie is probably as good as that ugly bastard Quentin is going to get. Christopher Walken does the absolute best Christopher Walken impression I have ever seen. Bruce Willis and John Travolta are extremely fun to watch. The sword was a great choice. Apart from the acting, it’s the movie’s background/environment that builds the feel of it into something different from the other movies in the top 5. Its scenes are perfectly constructed and laid out with a certain theatrical quality. And don’t forget the violence. There is plenty of blood to laugh at. Dirty, violent and fun to watch. What more can you ask? You can ask what’s in that damn case. I liked the Marcellus-Wallace-soul theory, but I guess the band aid was a coincidence because Ving Rhames has a scar there. Tarantino fed some BS about it being the loot from Reservoir Dogs. Maybe. Last thing, this has always bothered me. Jules is not holing a 9mm in the diner as he says, it’s a .45. I hate it when movies fuck up weapons.

#244 His Girl Friday (1940)

I'm sure my first thought was the same as most - a movie from 1940?! That means no special effects, no sex appeal, and no cursing - how can a movie be good enough to make the top 250 without any of those (it's black and white too!)?

How about by having a plot and witty dialogue? Honestly, there are no action scenes, no scantily clad women, and no foul language in 'His Girl Friday' (HGF); however, it kept my attention for all 92 minutes of run time. Every scene seemed to have some new quirky artifact from the past - dime poker, old-style telephones, expensive $12 hats. I really do believe the false anachronisms are what kept me involved (no real anachronisms - they all fit HGF's time of production and plot, but to me watching it in 2010 they felt out of place) waiting to see what peculiar-ness would come next.

A particular bit that made me laugh - really, I did... out loud - is part of a scene with Walter Burns (Cary Grant) describing Bruce Baldwin (Ralph Bellamy) to an accomplice to pick him out on the streets. He misses nary a beat in mentioning Bruce's striking resemblance to an actor, Ralph Bellamy. If you hear a faint bell ringing reading the name "Ralph Bellalmy", that is probably because you have seen Trading Places - and that you are old. I cheated and used the DVD's accompanying Filmography sections to discover this little gem: Ralph Bellamy is one of the scheming Wall Street'ers wagering on human nature in 'Trading Places'! *BAM* Take that to the trivia bank!

It boiled down to this: does the tired-of-the-same-old-run-you-ragged-job damsel decide to keep her new life with the boring insurance salesman or does she realize the non-stop pace of the news business is where she belongs?

#4 The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly:

Let me start by saying that I am a little bit drunk this time around. Spell check is keeping this coherent. This is a long, and slightly boring movie. It took about an hour and ten minutes to really tie the story into something other than the rambling events of different guys in 1865. Once it got going though, it was all right. A truly brutal depiction of the West in that era of near-end-of-war. There was so much symbolism though. I hate symbolism. The landscape of a war-torn American west is clearly an allusion to the bombed out cities of Europe in 1945.But other than that, I didn’t get it. The drunk captain, the pursuit of wealth from the dead, of the connection of The Ugly to the Union army. The movie felt like it was very pro-Confederacy. And I’ve never seen a man so happy in a cemetery. That has to mean something. In all, I guess, it’s a good movie, but I hate it when a movie is made in the context of the times. It makes it so hard for future generations to know what the sam hell is going on. That and Clint Eastwood’s a dick.

#3 The Godfather Part II:

This movie feels nothing like a sequel. Every drop of essence from the first is carried into the second. It is exactly what it says it is, Part II. Part II of a two part epic. (I chose to discount the third as it was made for other reasons than to complete the story.) I’m glad that I watched these two within the span of a few days. It really helped to tie them together, as they were meant to be. There really isn’t all that much more to say, except to briefly talk about Robert DeNiro. How did Coppola know? Why chose a relative unknown to star as the young Vito? In present day minds, DeNiro and Pacino are inevitably tied together, and not because of Righteous Kill, which sucked. They were two of the best and most intense actors of the 70’s and early 80’s. Names that are almost synonyms. I find it very strange. Having said that, why DeNiro? He gaze in particular is so different from Brando’s Vito Corleone that it almost feels like a different character. I had a difficult time with this aspect. But maybe that’s because I’ve seen too many DeNiro movies. That aside, don’t ask me to choose which of the two is the superior. It’s not like one half of a good sandwich is different from the other.

#2 The Godfather:

Some say it insists upon itself. And to that, I would only slightly agree. It does this only as far as Coppola knew he was making a movie that people would remember. The work is a masterpiece. Everyone in it is spectacular, even showcasing Al Pacino before he became a cartoon character. It’s even a little funny. Michael’s two Italian bodyguards sporting shotguns at his wedding is probably funnier than it is meant to be. One thing I have to commend this film for that has fallen out of practice these days is the careful consideration given to how the film was built. The first 2 hours or so take place over a time period of a few months in late 1945. The coloring, ambience and style on this part are spot on. And then somewhat chaotically, we shift to a few years later, and these same attributes have all changed to comply with the early 1950’s. It’s subtle, but really draws me in, even when I’m trying to think of what to review. The last bit of subtlety I’ll bring up is the character Michael Corleone. His transformation is obvious, and yet not, at the same time. He starts out as an innocent, and becomes cold and cutthroat. He handles the family business in such an absolute manner, to the point of dispatching all his enemies in a single day. The previous Don's manner of governance was more reasoning than bludgeoning. The film almost leans towards vilifying the young Michael. It is certain that Michael sees himself in this way. In the end, it was the acting that really shines though. Pacino and Brando's portrayals of deep and exceedingly complicated men of power put this above and beyond other films. I look forward to Part II.

Blood Diamond (2006)

Blood Diamond (BD) squeaks onto the list holding on to the bottom rung at #250. Most people know that diamonds are highly valued and come at a high cost, but usually consider this cost in dollars - not lives. BD attempts to give the viewer a peek into the world behind the diamond market, while entertaining them for a couple hours too (of course).

I am not going to pretend to know all the facts about the diamond-mining industry and its' related market(s) or what proper South African/African-native accents should sound like, so I will be considering the movie to be mostly accurate in those aspects. Before viewing BD, I had heard a bit about the movie through others' opinions and my own previous experience with DiCaprio movies - some I like (The Man in the Iron Mask, Catch Me If You Can) and some I don't (Gangs of New York) - leaving me unsure of what to expect. I liked Blood Diamond - it kept a pace that held my interest while telling a story that most people (including myself) find intriguing. While the ending may not surprise, BD will certainly entertain and please anyone looking for a film with action, drama, and a straight-forward plot.

#1 The Shawshank Redemption

....As long as I can remember, people have enjoyed the sound of my voice...All kidding aside, this movie deserves the top spot on the list. You’ve seen it. Everyone you know has seen it. If you haven’t, go watch it ten or twelve times. It wins in all categories. Fantastic acting, intriguing and suspenseful story, great score and soundtrack, and delving deeply into common unanswerable questions: What does it mean to be free, to be a man, and how does time affect us? This movie asks the audience these questions that we try not to ask ourselves, but not in a heavy handed sort of way. It is plain and simple, just like we like to think Morgan Freeman is.

Introduction

My friend and I like movies. We have seen more than our share and we tend to form opinions. We also tend to be argumentative. We have decided to take our big brains and apply them to a project. We are going to watch every movie on IMDB.com's Top 250 list and tell the world how we feel about each. This is going to take awhile; even though we decided to split it up. He starts from the bottom and I start from the top. We'll try to meet in the middle. We'll go as long as we can and make any adjustments we decide as situation demands. It's our list, so we can do whatever we want. We will try to keep it interesting.